Networking Tips

Happy Monday everyone!

Do you remember the first networking event you attended?  It seemed innocent enough at first.  You walk in and use the bathroom, re-touch your make up.  That killed about 5 minutes.  You walk out into the crowded room with a look like a deer in headlights, but then you spot the wine and cheese.  Excellent!  You help yourself to a plate of cheese (and you know it was a full plate of just cheese) and ask the waiter for a glass of Pinot Noir.  You're feeling good.  These networking events are great!  What a nice cheese selection!  Now you look back to the crowd and what to do?  Here are some tips.

1. Don't be scared or shy.  Everyone is there for the same reasons as you.  They want to meet you and learn about what your work is like and how you can potentially collaborate.  Scope out the room and find a single person or group of 3 that you can introduce yourself to.  I would avoid approaching two individuals talking as you might be interrupting, but a group of three allows you to eventually break off into pairs.

2.  Worried about an opening line?  Again, remember you're all there for the same reason.  A simple, "Hi, My name is ____ and I'm new to this event" will suffice.  Make sure you know your elevator pitch, though.  That's the next thing that inevitably your new networking acquaintance will ask.

3.  Don't get stuck.  If you find the conversation feels forced or it's not going in the direction you want, excuse yourself and start fresh with someone else.  The whole point of networking events is to meet people who have some connection to your business and can be a good partner or ally in the future.

4.  Always have business cards on hand and in convenient reach.  Oh, but you have a glass of wine in one hand and a plate of cheese in another!  Mistake!  Keep it to either a glass of wine or a plate of cheese, but not both.  Always make sure your right hand is free so you can shake someone's hand and grab your business cards.  A lady should keep her business cards in an outside pocket of her purse or an inside pocket like the ones that fit your cell phone for easy access.

5.  Follow up with the people you met.  I suggest following up the next day with an email.  Also put a reminder in your calendar to follow up with this person in a few weeks and suggest to meet up so that you maintain the relationship.  It was hard enough networking in the first place, so don't lose the valuable connections you made.

I hope these tips help next time your at a networking event!

written with love,
Leslie

photo from wecannetwork

5 Things to Appreciate Friday, May 2, 2014

Good morning!

It's finally Friday and it's FINALLY May!  I hope this means we get some hot weather soon.  

Here are 5 things that inspired me this week: 

1.   For better or worse, I jumped on the Birkenstock bandwagon.  Ugly shoes?  I think not.  WhoWhatWear and J Crew don't think so either.  It's all about how you style them!

Photo via WhoWhatWear

2.   This week I took one hour out of my workday to view a webinar.  My company has an entire e-learning website with lots of tutorials and refresher courses on finance.  It’s worthwhile to stay fresh on all relevant topics in your industry.  If your company doesn’t have these resources on hand, try checking out the website of a related independent industry association or simply read a book on a related topic.  You can always ask your colleagues questions or ask them to meet you for a coffee to discuss how to relate your new knowledge to current events in your industry. 

3.   Neurological findings in the Wall Street Journal this week.  Very interesting article on how the brain works.  Deadlines may not be as productive as we think.  Take note procrastinators, if you leave things to the last minute, you may not be developing the best material.

4.   I made it a point to go to the gym 3 times between Monday and Friday.  Happy to report I am set to make my goal today!  Cube living is unhealthy folks.  Many studies show that sitting for even 30 minutes slows your body down and increases your probability of developing heart disease and diabetes.  Check out this graphic from the Washington Post.  Even though 3 hours at the gym out of at least 40 working hours doesn’t come close to fixing the problem, it’s a start.  Stay tuned to my blog for a future post on how to stay healthy in your cube.  For now, check out the blog FitSugar, which has lots of ideas for workouts you can do at home. 

5.  Finally, after a busy week, it's important to take time for yourself.  Whether it's giving yourself a manicure or trying a new facial mask (both of which I took time to do this week thanks to my Birchbox subscription), it's nice to pamper yourself every so often.  

Hope you all had a great and productive week!  Until Monday!

written with love,
Leslie

Are you feeling confident this morning?

Good Monday morning everyone!

This weekend I spent time thinking about confidence after I came across this article written in The Atlantic.  The premise of the piece, written by Katty Kay and Claire Shipman, is that women suffer from self-doubt and that feeling confident is just as important as knowing your stuff.  The authors have researched the topic extensively since 2009 when they began working on their book, Womenomics (which I have not yet read, but it's now on my list). So while the number of women executives is on the rise, albeit slowly, their research shows that even in these circles of executives, the women are often clouded by a lack of confidence in themselves.  The men, not so much.

The article points to research that has shown different traits in women than men that lead them to be confident only when they can do something perfectly.  Perfection is not real, though, and its definition is subjective to different people.  Some of the traits stem from biological differences between women and men.  Women activate their amygdalae (the brain's fear center) more easily than men in response to something negative.  This is to say, women are worriers and we overanalyze (I am sure we can all agree with this, I sure do!).  The good news is that these feelings of self-doubt and negativity can be reversed as we acquire more confidence.

Image from risenetworks.org

It's important for us women to focus on closing the gap between our confidence and our competence.  I learned this early on in my mere 8 years in the working world.  I attended graduate school right after attaining my undergraduate degree and therefore had to catch up to what real world work really was like once I graduated with my masters and began working full time.  I would do my work as I was told, as quickly and accurately as I could, and I expected to be rewarded for that.  I didn't think outside the box or about how my company worked in the big picture, but focused on my immediate deliverables.

After several months I realized that I needed to gain a greater perspective of the company and of how it fit within the context of my industry in order to really participate and be viewed as a valuable player by the firm.  My competence level grew, but my confidence had to grow with it just as quickly.  For me, the best way to gain confidence was to meet other people in the industry, have conversations with them about relevant and timely topics, and basically put myself out there.  This meant within the company as well as outside it at industry networking events.  My motto was to fake it (i.e, my confidence) until I believed it.

Competence is something you can learn on the job.  You don't have to pass up an opportunity for a new role just because you don't fit every qualification on the list.  Chances are many of those you will learn quickly once in that new role.  Being ever curious and asking questions is key to gaining that competence.  As for confidence, I think that's something that grows internally.  As women, we need to let go of over analyzing and flip our thoughts from "I can't do this" to "how can I learn to do this" or "how can I do this better."  When I hear from top female managers at my firm, the common thread is that they consider that at some point in their career they have made moves that they viewed as "risky" and been rewarded for it.  I take this to mean that they have pushed through those negative over analyzations and created confidence for themselves to make that career move.

It's still going to be hard.  There will be people who don't encourage women, but the key is to have the confidence to persevere over those negative people, meaning we need to be strong-willed and take action.

I hope everyone takes action this week and throws away any negative thoughts they might have.

written with love,
Leslie

smile it's friday!

Good morning!

I once gave a friend who was going through a hard time a journal and suggested she write down 3 things each day that were positive.  I'm not sure that she did it, and while it's advice that I personally gave, I never actually did it myself.  That's changing today.  I think it's always a good idea to stop and reflect on positive things going on in our lives and in our world.  My Friday posts will be a dedicated space to these musings.  I hope you appreciate them and apply it as you need for yourselves.  Too often we get lost in the busy or monotonous rhythm of the day and don't take time to reflect.

Here are my 5 great things about the week of April 21st!

1. I started the week on Sunday at the Ai Wei Wei exhibit at the Brooklyn Museum.  It was fascinating to review a very modern history of China through his work.  Ai Wei Wei was imprisoned for his outspokenness against the Chinese government.  Below is a picture of one of his exhibits, an array of bicycles that is meant to depict the people of China, whose main form of transportation is by bike.

2. I was able to have dinner and catch up with my best friend from high school this week. And we had Magnolia Cupcakes for dessert.  AWESOME!!!

3. Monday and Tuesday there was a conference held in Times Square called "Living Cities of Tomorrow." See the agenda here.  As a trained urban planner, it was exciting to catch some of the discussions online.  It's invigorating to hear so many great minds talking about recreating our cities even though we might not be at an execution stage for all these ideas yet.  You can review some of the discussions here. 

4. As a career focused woman, I try to maintain and create networks within my industry.  This week, I met with a leading affordable housing policy implementer over a morning coffee.  We both have a background in finance and I learned about her transition into the policy world.  While I am not ready to leave the finance part of my career just yet it's never too early to begin thinking, and networking, about a potential future career move.

5. And this would not be a fashion blog if I didn't share my new purchase that arrived this week!  My very first Clare Vivier clutch, which I got during the Shop Bop sale last week.  Cannot wait to use this bag!

Have a great weekend!

written with love,
Leslie :)

1st photo from urbancasita.  2nd photo from my visit to the Brooklyn Museum.